Two Brits let loose
in America
We have just spent two weeks holidaying with our son, Jonathan
and our daughter-in-law Alyssa in Salem Massachusetts. Yes that Salem; the one
with the witch trials in 1692, a period of societal hysteria and injustice.
Most places would consign their dubious history to the archive but this is
America - so let’s turn it into a tourist destination!
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| Beautiful bay |
The centre of Salem has been reduced to everything ghastly
and ghoulish with, amongst others, a Witch House, a History of Witches Museum,
a Pirate Museum, the Nightmare gallery and Fatima’s Psychic Studio and shop
upon shop selling all things weird and witch like. However the up side of all
this is that Salem, away from the witchy centre, has loads of cafes and
restaurants and quite a vibrant upbeat feel.
The waterfront is pleasant with a
replica ship gracing one of the old docks. Many of the original and gracious
houses have survived and there is much to savour apart from the booming witch
industry.
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| Customs' House |
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| Replica ship in the harbour |
In fact the whole of the coast north of Boston is full of pretty
wooded bays and inlets, huge homes and small boats bobbing in every sheltered
waterway. The beach at Gloucester is beautiful even if the $20 (£15) parking
fee is eye watering but if you don’t mind walking a mile, you can park for
free. The car park was packed even at these prices so someone is raking it in.
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| Rockport - murky afternoon |
Further north, Rockport is quaint in a New Age kind of way but
with a booming tourist economy based on shops selling all manner of tourist tat
and plenty of cafes and restaurants. Further
north Newburyport is charming with a beautiful riverside walk and upmarket
shops.
This is also New England so weatherboard houses are everywhere
and as Arthur Daley from Minder would
say, ‘The world’s your lobster.’ Lobsters are ubiquitous, alive in tanks or
bright red from being boiled. You can even buy lobster rolls in McDonalds. Lobsters
are also reproduced as key rings, can openers, door handles and in any other
form, size or colour you can imagine.
Food
The matter of lobsters leads on to the broader issue of
food. Eating out is a bewildering experience to Brits used to more conservative
fare. Menus come with all manner of foods and combinations unheard of on our
side of the Atlantic. Even so, having
selected your menu option, it then seems beholden upon you to tailor it to your
specific requirement, re-arranging the food items till you have exactly what
you would like, the way you would like it. However with three carbs per
plateful and liberal amounts of butter, it can be wise to re-design some
healthier options.
Supersize is normal and most portions seem to give you two
sittings so take away in polystyrene containers is a must. You can enjoy the
rest of your tailor made meal tomorrow as well as today! The only exception to this is ice cream – of
course!
The ice cream experience is second to none. In this area
there are two superb ice cream places. One is just a regular parlour – fantastic
- but the other is a place to visit in its own right. Richardson’s is an ice cream factory complete
with the cows and goats that provide the milk along with mini golf and a golf
range – naturally? Ice cream is served from a long line of counters, each with
its own queue of people even at 9 p.m., similar to Border Control at Stanstead
Airport. The range of flavours is
comprehensive, an enormous long list but also puzzling. What is grapenut
custard flavour or black raspberry or toffee crunch with Heath bars? Portions
are also supersize with a child’s cup equivalent to a meal.
Outings
Apart from exploring Salem and the surrounding area, we also
ventured further afield to Vermont and the town of Burlington beautifully
situated on Lake Champlain, modestly named by Monsieur Champlain after himself.
It is a university town, bustling and lively and the countryside of Vermont is
charming – green fields alongside wooded mountains and valleys. Vermont is also
home to Ben and Jerry’s, the ethical ice cream makers. A tour of their factory is very informative
and ends with a small cup of their delicious ice cream.
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| Beautiful lake Champlain |
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| Burlington with a bustling night life |
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| Ben and Jerry visit |
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| Lake Champlain |
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| Big swing seats on the lake side. |
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| Ferry from Salem to Boston |
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| Boston harbour side |
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| The famous ducks in the park |
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| Freedom Park |
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| Bunker Hill |
We had all visited Boston before so it was more of a
refresher course except for our walk up Bunker Hill, the site of the last
battle that the Brits won against the nascent American nation. Soon after would follow the Boston Tea Party
and a few more confrontations before the Brits’ final expulsion, south of the
49th parallel, back to our side of the Atlantic.
Bunker Hill now has an impressive obelisk which can be
climbed by the energetic and below in the docks in USS Constitution ‘Old
Ironsides’ so called because cannon balls bounced of her sides.
We trudged back across the Charles River then through little
Italy, decorated in red, white and green and on Friday afternoon full of all
manner of food stalls. Boston was now a-buzz
with pre weekend anticipation but we took a diversion through Freedom Park, a
holocaust memorial and surely one of the most moving places to visit before
returning on the ferry to Salem.
Pronunciation
George Bernard Shaw was indeed right when he said England and America are two countries separated by a common
language. It isn’t just the language though – it’s how you say it. We
spent some amusing moments comparing the pronunciation of Adirondacks, chipotle,
Montpelier (the Vermont one not the French Montpellier) and even Peabody.
Money
America at some levels seems to be still in the dark ages where
credit cards are concerned. Chip and PIN is almost unknown as are hand held
card readers. Much more common in restaurants is that waitresses walk off with
your credit card and then return it with a slip onto which you add the tip,
sign and leave it. It entirely depends
on the waitress being honest and not putting any old amount on your card.
You can spend $50 in a store with no signature or use of a PIN
so if anyone found a card lying on the floor they could go into a shop and buy
up to $50 worth of goods with no questions asked. How come fraud is not more
prevalent?
On the other hand drinks can be bought in Starbucks and other
coffee shops using their App loaded with money.
It acts as a loyalty card with bonuses for loyal customers. The two don’t quite add up.
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| Jonathan and Alyssa's church |
However having said all that – we had a ball. It was great to spend time with Jonathan and
Alyssa and they certainly made life easier as they translated the culture for
us as we went along. My big mistake was
ordering chicken salad platter which I assumed (wrongly) would be a nice salad
with some chicken. Chicken salad is actually a solid lump of white something
reminiscent of warm ice cream which may or may not have some chicken in it and
the tomato and cucumber were more of a garnish than a salad. The look on Jonathan’s face when I ordered
should have warned me I was not getting what I expected.
However we found Americans across the board were friendly and
wanted to meet Jonathan’s parents with their ‘cute’ accent. We loved visiting
Jonathan and Alyssa’s church where Jonathan plays in the worship band. It was all
refreshingly different and uplifting.
We thoroughly enjoyed our whole holiday. What an experience. As we flew back across the
Atlantic, leaving Boston further and further behind, I was filled with sadness;
sorrow at leaving Jonathan and Alyssa behind, leaving the sunshine and America
and all those calories. I hadn’t expected it but I left a little of my heart in
Salem.
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| Peter Rabbit themed baby shower |
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| Alyssa's baby shower |


















